Monday, June 20, 2011

Cutting back

I admit it. I'm a chronic joiner. Always have been. Look at my resume' from high school to college to afterward, and you can see that I've joined a variety of organizations. Since I went to school in rural areas, clubs gave me the an outlet to travel, compete, and see places. It helped me earn scholarships. It padded my early resume' with honors and awards, and it kept me out of trouble. I don't regret it.

I didn't enjoy my first two years of college because I wasn't involved. I worked. I studied. And, I got another job and worked more. I thought college was supposed to be more exciting than this...so as I researched other colleges to transfer, I also tried out the campus television station. The baptist student union. A sorority. The debate team. And by my junior year, I started enjoying college as I added more clubs and organizations to the list. I got to know people at my small campus fairly quickly and I threw my transfer papers in the trash.

I followed the same pattern in my adult life. I get interested in a club. I join. I'm dependable, responsible, and helpful by nature so I generally wind up in a leadership position in three years or less. Then, I get overbooked. Stressed. Getting out of bed too early on a Saturday morning and wondering why in the heck I'm doing this.

Every so often, I'd realize I wasn't living my life. My life was living me.

As my family changes and expands, I've realized this can't go on. Something has got to go. So, I've cut back my extracurricular activities dramatically. I've given up board positions. I've cut back on volunteering. I've carefully examined what I get out of clubs and what I don't. I've made new rules about my involvement....such as aside from religious organizations, I refuse to join an organization with a weekly commitment. I look for flexibility and the benefit of networking. Does something cause me stress? Do I really enjoy being with everyone here? Aside from one organization that where I'm fulfilling a leadership obligation, I've culled back my involvement to it's lowest point that it's been since about the fourth grade.

And, as life has slowed down and I sometimes have weekends with zero commitments and instead projects I can complete and days I can spend at the park or cook my family dinner, I've loved the transition. Who knew?

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